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Tuesday 7 January 2014

SO MUCH BLOG WHERE TO BEGIN!!

Ok, so I've basically 3 posts to make here.
1. 2 things that I had been meaning to write about for about a year now but kept fobbing it off. It'll be short.
2. pics and shit about my day today.
3. cool shiz that is well dope.

1- Random overdue stuff.
So first up, what are these mysterious things I've been meaning to write about...

The first one is a little embarrassing I guess.

One time when I was very little I was at home from school because I was sick. For some reason I was watching some really weird documentary because back in those days I had a choice of 6 tv channels because I'm pretty sure it was even before TV3 and TG4 (or whatever it was called back then) doesn't count because ew who understands Irish. So anyway there was little me watching this documentary that I thought was about music, but looking back it actually must have been about stripping but that was just so over my head as I was honestly about 6 or 7. I'm not sure how it was daytime tv, maybe it was mostly innocent, but there was one part that just stuck with me. The women being interviewed had REALLY long tongues, and I was a little boy and mildly infatuated with snakes so I thought this was the coolest thing since tomagotchis. So these "ladies" were talking about how they did stretches for their tongue everyday to get them to be so long and flexible. I literally had no idea why they wanted such long tongues (I still don't really know why, it's kinda gross seeing a really long tongue, but presumably it's somehow related to blowies) but I still thought the concept of having a really long tongue was like a superpower nearly.


Honestly, who wants that shit? She looks like an attractive girl but my god I wouldn't be rushing after her. Imagine kissing her. She'd be able to tickle your tonsils with that monstrosity. Actually that sounds hilarious. Imagine having your tonsils tickled..... Hmmmmm... May have to review my thoughts on this..... Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... Nah, still a no-go. I'd probably be suffocated.
Anyway, my point here is just how it's funny how children (or at least child-me) look on things in such a different way. Such different things are considered cool for totally different reasons as you grow up.

The second random thing I've mentioned is something that I wanna just throw out there and see if any other lads (or even fembots I suppose) are guilty of this...
Did you ever pause movies growing up when there were boobs on display? I have such vivid memories of watching The 5th Element on VCR (midweek movie recording with the classic galaxy ads, such a nostalgia watch now) with my cousin and pausing at the bit where Mila Jovovich changes her top in the background. It was an out of focus background boob, but it was boob none-the-less. We'd be all to ready to press play in case one of my parents came in, but it was worth the hassle. It was boob and it was ours to see. Our boob. This is what a boob was. This was what men live for and as far as we could tell it was awesome!
Kids these days have it so friggin' easy. If they want to see some boob all they have to do is open incognito window - type boob into the google search bar - go to images - BAM. Hundreds of boobs. I don't know how they cope. If the first time I saw boob it was in a google search and I was flooded with hundred of the fleshy blobs I think my little brain would have just crashed. I hope I don't sound like a pervy child here because I really wasn't. This was about the extent of my boob viewing til I was about 14.
It's funny how boys from the age of about 11-17 call each other gay the whole time, or at least in Ireland when I was growing up that was the case. I used to be actually worried that maybe I was gay just because people called each other gay so often. I never once would have thought, well, I like these boobs and peen/man is not for me sooooooo...... I was far too insecure as most teenagers are. I've actually talked about this before.

2- Today - (the internet went last night so this is now yesterday)!
Ok so here's some pictures from my day today.

I was walking around aimlessly killing time earlier (I thought I was waiting for my friend to come visit me but he got too busy at work) when I saw this ice sculptor dude.


He was carving a pretty sweet 2014 into a block of ice with a chainsaw and busting the occasional dance move to the loud french pop music. it was very cool.


There was a bit of a crowd around him and I took my share of photos and was in the process of buzzing off when I heard a noise and had to turn around.


Yeahhh that's right buddy, that's a blowtorch in his left hand. Naturally I turned around and was all what the shit's he gonna do with this. So he started doing some more dancing and lighting that ice on fiyaaaa. Well. Not actually on fire, but he was melting the shit out of it, and it ended up looking really cool and see-through. Then I eventually decided to retreat to my room.


The finished product with some people from the crowd.


I was in my room nice and I saw the snow-groomer thingy going and it looked quite amazing so I took a picture. I should say this is the nursery slopes which is visible from my balcony, I'll talk about it later. So being happy with myself I took the pictures off my camera and was chilling out listening to Skye when I heard all this banging. At first I was thinking shiiiiiiiiit are the walls that thin? The neighbours must be seriously pissed off. Then I realised it was fireworks outside so I went to my balcony and couldn't see them which was disappointing. I went back inside and after about 5 minutes of humming and hawing and expecting them to stop any second I put on my shoes, grabbed the camera and headed downstairs. And of course it was so typical, the instant I got outside I just saw a firework go off and people started whistling. It was over. I did realise there was some sorta event going on though by the bottom of the slopes so I mosied over and saw what became of the second block of ice.


 Pretty cool no?


There was music playing and this wee lass doing balerina shit in that plastic ball. It wasn't terribly exciting to be honest. Although they were giving out free hot chocolate and vin-chauds.


The hot-choco was pretty muck, but the vin-chaud was delish. I plonked it in the snow and took a picture. It's very exciting. The problem was that after I did this it was no longer a vin-chaud. The snow cooled the crap out of it.


And here's a piccy of the bell-tower which is visible from the front of the apartment block.

So back to the nursery slope. It's definitely the best slope to have visible from your balcony. Kids are friggin' hilarious. I was standing out there for maybe 5 minutes and in that time I saw one kid fall over at the start of the drag lift and get dragged along the ground the whole way up to the top of the lift. And I saw one kid go over this little ramp thingy, and she snow-ploughed too hard so her skis slipped outwards and she ended up being stuck doing the splits over the jump. It was gas altogether.

3- Stuff I enjoy.
So finally the "cool shiz that is well dope.".

First off. This is Skye Edwards from Morcheeba.
She's my favourite famous person. Watch this video and you'll see why.
She's soooo sweet. The bit about not telling a wish, awwww. And the music is so good.

Here's this pretty good blog I've been reading lately. It's this nursing student from 'merica, she's funny I think, and the fact her blog's name is a dragonballz pun is pretty cool in a totally uncool way.
If you're too lazy to click the link, there's these 2 videos in it. They're super cool so I'm going to link one of them here anyway because I know most of you won't bother even though maybe you should.


4- Today again.
This is a bonus 4th section (woooo) because I had written most of the above yesterday before the internet went.
So I rented skiis today, got up early and skiied my unfit ass off until after a pathetic 2 and a half hours I had to take an early lunch because I was completely knackered. I say an early lunch but all I ate was an apple. It's so exhausting skiing by yourself, you basically just don't stop ever. I NEEED breaks. So come half 11 I'm back in my apartment and I lie down and wake up an hour later, still exhausted. So I snooze another hour and then hit them slopes again. The second session was way more fun as I was feeling a bit more confident again, and I was listening to music in my cool earphone-hat instead of wearing a helment (which is far too warm). So blah blah I was skiing, why are you telling me this you may be asking yourself. You knew I was going to be going skiing, so who gives a crap? Well I'll tell you, my wallet gives a crap. I went to return the skiis when yer wan in the shop points out to me that I've totally broken one of them...... UH OH..... I didn't even notice it, but under the binding the edge of the ski had pushed out somehow leaving a hole in the bottom of the ski... They basically told me the ski is irreparable and it'd be going in the bin. I don't think my travel insurance covered it and I hadn't taken out insurance with them so basically I had to pay for it all. I was kinda like fuuuuuuuckfuckfuckfuck since I had no idea whatsoever how much they'd charge. I figured I'd been skiing fine on the ski though so I may as well ask if I could keep it if I was going to be paying for it, to which they replied yeah sure it was only going to go in the bin. So I'm 218 euro down which was a little less than I expected thankfully. She said they charged me the price they buy them for which is like 35% less than I would be able to buy it for, which at the time sounded like a sweet deal but I've since considered that it was probably last years skis. So they've had a solid 5 months probably of renting it out most weeks I imagine so it's been worn down a lot. Did they overcharge me? I dunno... I was too exhausted to care to be honest. At least now I have a pair of skis which work, even if one of them may snap in half as they warned me. Also at least I have bindings too so if I ever want to buy new skiis I won't need to buy bindings! I still need to buy ski-boots though. I hadn't even planned on buying skiis but it can't hurt to have a bad pair anyway. I can ski over rocks now and not worry about my skiis! Although I'll still have to worry about the fleshpod in which I reside.

I think I've linked this song loads of times but it really is an awesome song to ski to.


Ok I'm knackered. I'm going to watch a movie. PEACE.

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