This post is really long so I'm going to throw in mildly relevant pictures to prevent boredom

I got back from Edinburgh yesterday afternoon. It was a ridiculously stress-free trip home and I've been feeling pretty great for the last day and a half since I got home. 

Edinburgh itself was very enjoyable, it completely flew by and nothing too crazy happened, just the usual sorta craic. It was quite a laid back buzz in comparison to the much livelier buzz of second year, but it was definitely more relaxing this time round, the incredible weather helped too. I had a decent amount of sleep each night and didn't actually do anything in particular other than at some stage make it to the park during the days, which is basically what I had planned for it to be like so I was happy out. 

I think my name is probably on a police database in England now. Outside the club one of the nights some dickhead Scots lads were trying to start fights with people, and eventually ended up attacking I guess one of my mates. There was only 3 of them (all looking for a fight) but there was 6 of us and 2 girls (none looking for a fight) so we pulled them off and for the most-part were pretty restrained. One of our lads got a smack in the nutsack (he sounded in sooo much pain, I was worried he'd been stabbed for a second) and hit in the face, and one of them got hit in the face too. The guy who got hit in the face went absolutely loco. He kept following us as we were walking away bringing one of the girls to tears so the police came and blah blah blah. Pretty much as an afterthought the police took my name and address too which in hindsight maybe I should have lied about but I didn't. I didn't really think about it til my dad asked me when I got home did I give my real name. I got the impression he thought I shouldn't have which is saying something since he's a pretty moral guy. Him in his youth would have been a great lad to have around actually that night. Apparently back in the day when New York was a shithole full of thieves he saw some woman getting mugged, so he ran over, knocked the guy out and then stuffed him in a phonebox til the police came. I need to ask him about that again actually, I have a feeling he got someone else to hold the door closed so he could leave and not get in trouble for knocking the guy out. Lads who grow up on farms are hard enough lads.

Actually had a lovely day today with the dad. I didn't go for a sail with him as planned, which turned out to be a decent call since I would have really wanted to go for a swim, but apparently the water was filthy everywhere. I read my book instead, but we went to see the new Men In Black movie this evening. It was pretty poor, the first few minutes were quite shit, but it picked up a bit and became tolerable. We took the motorbike since traffic out of Howth was absolutely shite. It's fun going on the back of a bike, but I imagine it's far more fun being the one driving it. That's definitely something I want to learn to do at some stage. 

This song was buzzin' around in my head for a lot of the time in Edinburgh. It's great. It's such a lovely gift of a song to give to his mother. 

When we got back to Dublin I had to take the bus to get to Sutton where my dad picked me up. On the bus I was listening to Kanye and was feeling the most content I have felt in years. It was an hour long trip to go what would take 20 minutes in the car, but the bus goes through swords/malahide/portmarnock then sutton so it's a bit of a randabout way. I didn't mind though because a lot of it is by the sea and it was really really nice to just have that time to think and be introspective as shit; I had a sense of clarity in my head at the time that just felt very nice. I'd like if I could always have my thoughts arranged as tidily as then.

In Swords there was a white man driving a jeep of sorts with a young black girl in the front seat, presumably his daughter. I want to say she was about 8 but I'm crap at guessing children's ages, all I know is she was a ridiculously cute child, it was definitely one of those moments of - More than anything in the world I want this. She reminded me of one of the girls who I taught last summer in Kenya. Her name was Miriam. Well. It's actually kinda funny. I think her name was Miriam but she was awful at English, especially writing it, but wasn't much better at speaking it (some of the kids can speak it pretty well but are just shit at writing it). So she would spell her name wrong sometimes, jumble up the order of the letters and stuff, her copy said Mirimi  but on the class list she was Miriam. She was one of my favourites as much as I shouldn't have had favourites and tried not to. I'm not going to put up any picture of her, that wouldn't be right. She was a small girl, about 9 I think, had big eyes and a brilliant, infectious smile. Her mannerisms were even cuter, she used to link baby fingers with me when she could, and when I'd be trying to play a trick on the kids, or be funny or one of them was being funny she used to really slowly wink. It's sad because I know she wasn't very good at school, but she definitely had a sharp wit about her. She most likely will not go far in life, but I really really really hope she'll be happy. I hope they'll all be happy.

In Malahide I was once again baffled by the amount of young people, I always think it's nuts when I go through it, where the flunk do they all come from? In Howth the average age is just ancient in comparison. I reckon Malahide would be a cool place to grow up. I decided I should consider it for if I want to settle down in Ireland.

Then when I got to Portmarnock the traffic got insane. Since it was a class day everybody had flooded there to go to the beach and whatnot. There was hundreds of young teens. I was in the middle/back of the top floor of the bus, there had been about 5 of us up there, but at Portmarnock the whole top level got filled up with noisy-ass kids. I imagined they had been drinking and up to shenanigans but in general all they meant to me was that I had to turn up my music a lot. They kept screaming and shouting and just my god teenagers are noisy around the age of 14/15.
Then suddenly they meant more to me.
Out of nowhere, the girl in front of me went from becoming someone I hadn't noticed, to someone with quite a considerably high probability of puking on me. She got sick, nothing of substance, just a bit of watery-puke into the aisle and all her friends jumped away from the seats anywhere near her. Her boyfriend stayed beside her and one of her girl mates started looking after her, but the others started chanting shit and all that crap you'd expect from slightly rough 15 year old lads. The boyfriend turns around and goes "heeyar, *insert sham name here*, if yer brudder wasn't who he is I'd knock da fuckin' head of ya so sh'up.", which was kinda chivalrous and all to his girlfriend I guess, it made me think he was a nice guy even if he did come off a prick too for his choice of method to shut them up. He was really sunburnt. In fact most of them were. Actually I'm just remembering the STENCH of sweat and suncream that came onto the bus with that group. At one stage the puking girl turned around and looked back the bus, right past me. Her eyes were out of focus and she had a slight smile on her face, she looked so gone it was ridiculous. I felt quite sorry for her. I was glad to see the back of that group though. I was very glad I hadn't been puked on at all.


This is pretty chill.

One of the nights in Edinburgh when I got home I was drunk, and as I was falling asleep listening to music, I was wondering what to do with all this bottled up affection I have. Since I can't seem to get any girl fitting the unrealistic standards I grant myself, I decided that the puppy had to happen. Since I've gotten back though I feel like something good is coming my way soon, and a dog isn't in the forefront of my mind any longer. I don't know what, but I just feel like good, happy times are ahead.

The weekend has ended, and I hope the good weather stays a while. I'd really like to go cliff jumping one of these days, haven't swam in too long. It's nice during the week too because there's a significantly lower chance of there being a group of pikies there.

If you've made it this far, far play tya son.

For my loyalest followers:

{"iv":"7FRd+42xuoZB7nw2iCGY+w","salt":"XOrDkk0o5cw","ct":"A604uCJLGp+siRNYd7WICDgdmzBlQYV+6fUM1T+QzyqxbUQTJabsHi+X4CPQb8XABRZAKSU8VKWmy5PInw67ycJU2Kr0bZw/fRCmPq2/kMEfT7Nxwb2NRy06jhbSV5YknoOZJa6OonWueSUBZFb8NWNaMG+OPrbIMMB2PkJeHt6o6TD5o9TnThEnV2TFi96/ZLUb65d2esEr3q3Ubm+9+WZm5HO+/SQ1b7XrCx6NgcR7uvFXN8VotwBAVnizL7Ih/PU1CQjdXstl"}

-I've received a complaint about the ciphertext looking like it's going to say a lot, and then people being disappointed with the brevity of the actual message.... If this actually bothers more than just the lynch I can look into compressing it... But honestly, do you care?

Questions:
"Have you ever been in love? ps the text decryption is hard to read, maybe a darker text colour?" - I've had plenty of crushes, too seldom voiced and too seldom returned, but the very rare occasions they were I wouldn't go so far as to say that it was "love", I'd certainly hope it wasn't, although I would never rule out that they couldn't have grown to be. "Love" definitely isn't something you just "fall" into at first sight, I think it's something that requires you to grow into. I'm really just too inexperienced to be saying anything about this sorta thing in all honesty. Re: darker text, that can be changed easily, trek of re-uploading it though. If 3 people tell me to change it I'll update the link with a new version.

The calm before the storm.

Howiyiz. So I've been getting into the swing of doing nothing and I'll tell you this for free. It's boring, but it sure as fuck beats studying.

I always think these lads are such gimmicky pricks. To be fair, he's better than I'll ever be, but it's just so "Ooooh look at me, I don't have to look to play it". It seems impressive to people who don't play the piano, but it doesn't mean they're the most incredible piano players in the world, it just means they're attention-seekers. A lot of the time it makes fuck all difference whether your eyes are closed or not (unless of course you're trying to read the piece in which case it makes a little bit more of a difference). 


Guess what this is:

It had been quite a while since I had bothered to put that much effort into one. My eyes felt really weird afterwards actually, might not bother putting in much effort again for a while.
{"iv":"zgF4Z4P503liyLMvfPkvsA","salt":"DiYbOu7a0lA","ct":"lWzk2OWCoytrA4V+BOP1GowjBh4qB8zeyPOo3tWk7TO94/p2/Ecrd5YBIGs89b5C6uge2etKDZe43vxNeGwqW/ZqYyzUJeDl+pTmAdw3XaM5Nl8mJfhlYp/Dr3A8PIAH5tvf8X8Jf5azEAKYhwNat5ixuRFTnbV12d+wjtQgTmfI7QwYCCoPQoR7T8YtAodcFXiRtRP+mIO9ySSmI1/YPxsAcPPufZp5mN8OAtHComJerMRBX3Bo2klNlMuVjb5DqAeWWHdUkW0PmBfiu58iMIA6AMChL02LJN4iyS3LJXhlwLbUc6pZXEB0PoHAJTcZSZcbDwA3QqRP+SZfPIVV09/ifEC9f9FW26K487yaYJ2Uw+jvdhfiKODHiw"}


- if anybody has any feedback on the app just let me know and I'll fix it and stick a link to the new version on the side instead...


Going to play some golf tomorrow with Donal, Matthew and Staples. I hope they're all as bad as me. 


Went to Purty Kitchen with college peeps last night, I had my ipod touch and headphones nicked while my coat was in the cloak room there before back at the start of 2nd year/ end of first year. I decided I'd never go there again, but I think I got sucked into going once more ages ago and it was shit. Wasn't too keen to go again last night but it was a bit of a laugh. One of the French lads was telling me how he gets Irish girls and was saying I should try it. You just go: "Hello, Je m'appelle Jean. I am France.  What's your name?". Easy as apparently. I didn't try it. It was crazy how young everybody was in Purty Kitchen actually. The majority of people were about 18 I'd say. 

Actually, you know where you get off the dart at pearse and are walking towards the corner to cross to the trinity side, and there's those "coves" near the door into the JCR? Well while we waited outside the dart station for 2 of the lads there were 2 girls taking a piss down there. Girls pissing in public is gross.

Actually, ever heard of a Hysterectomy?

I hadn't until today. Didn't know that shit was even possible. Shows what I know eh. 

I'd quite like to go on a road trip to where my sister died again. I've only been to the actual place once, but I'd like to see it again. It was a beach in Clifden, quite a pretty place really. I'd like to write her a message, and burn her a cd, and just leave it there for her. I know I don't believe in any of that sort of thing, but I think it's something I'd still like to do. Sorta to prove to myself that I still remember her, and she'll always be a part of my life. Who knows where I could end up moving to over the next while and what'll happen in my life. I may not have another opportunity in a long, long time. It's odd. My parents go to the grave every Sunday, but I so rarely go with them. I'm not sure if I'm just a bit weird about that or what. I feel less than I should there I think. The grave means so little to me. It isn't a reminder of my sister, how could it be, she was never even there. It's a reminder that she's dead sure, but so are most things/occasions. At the same time, I wouldn't like for the grave to become overgrown or anything, then people might think she's forgotten or something. Does that make me a bit of a hypocrite? I think it does, but somehow it still doesn't change how I feel.

On a partly related note, I've had only 1 question lately.
"Talk to God much?" - No. Not at all really. I'd love if I still believed in a god, but I can't dupe myself into it. So many comforts come with religion, it'd be so nice to think there was this guy looking out for me. A bigger plan that I fit into. But if I'm going to believe that I might as well believe something even more convenient, like that every single thing I do in my life is the right decision, and even things that seem like bad decisions are good ones because I can't make mistakes really as it's all in my life's plan. Actually, I was trying to make up something that sounded really class to believe yet ridiculous, but it ended up just sounding a lot like Christianity didn't it.....

Encrypto-blog

So I've slaved for the last 24 hours to make this slick little blog app for myself and you guys to use, with help from my Chief Head of the Test Engineering Department, a.k.a Kelly.
It only works with Google Chrome.
Click here to download
This post will just go through how to use it pretty much.
The steps are basically, Download, Install, Get Password, Decrypt, Have a laugh.

First step. Download the app from filedropper.com using the link above.
If that link dies, send me an email please (judgeja@tcd.ie)

Step two. Install the app. -- EDIT
Chrome has changed about how they want you to install extensions, (and loads of other shit to do with extensions)
So now, when you download it, you've got to open up your browsers extensions page in a new tab.
You can go straight to it here: chrome://chrome/extensions/
Then just drag the file onto this page and it should say the privileges the app needs and let you install it. That's it.

[old way :: When you download it, you should be prompted by chrome to install it. Click continue and then ADD. If you are not prompted, find wherever you downloaded the file to, and open it with Google Chrome(right click it etc). If you can't do that, well, I'm not going to teach you how to use a PC.]

Step the third. Get a name (you probably already have one), and a password.
This is the bit where this app gets a bit lame. You have to email me to get the password. This is so I can know it's basically not my parents or someone who I don't want reading my more personal stuff. So email me at judgeja@tcd.ie with a name you are going to use (such as James if your name is James) and I'll message you back as soon as I can with a password for that name. Then just stick the name and password as given to you into the app. The Password I send back will be two numbers, keep the space, it's important. E.g "123746134652 13" (this isn't an actual password)

Step four. Decrypt shit
This is probably where cock-ups will happen. You take whatever is encrypted on my blog, and paste it into the text box. It'll be something like
{"iv":"N5JCEl5wIf9QD0yEKsTzGg","salt":"MtlSoVCHlms","ct":"qwSSVJRzfT/WrVjigjU8/g"}
So you just copy all of that, and paste it into the text box. If it doesn't work, make sure you didn't accidentally have any characters at the start or stick any at the end.

Step five. Have a laugh.
The Random Link has 11 links or so, the random song has about 98 songs or something linked. Lots of random selections.

If anybody has a blog and wants the app for the blog writer to encrypt, I'll gladly pass it on. I won't gladly make you a customised reader side app though, it's a trek, unless you want to pay me, in which case it's no problem.

If you run into any problems, please email me them and I'll try fix them and re-upload the app as soon as I can.

Here's a super secret story!
{"iv":"wpsVxAy5b0ciFdoZOV1nNg","salt":"sRXce4qi9cw","ct":"iHrly+9OrUolORp1Eo7Bj4uI/NCqeRZxN+g8DJTqOpHj3mWDd8Fj81xxBGsNT05AC2yhWzmYcNbaIN/E1AT1MhO1pQKcFsAC0hk3I1U5GLgfpVk6JM1+Tx4EbYEl08j50Dr3MuqFAt1t34rfXIEk7V9Mc+S67B4dfE03gVLC0IiEOlJOIbti2vX6oYjmUGIMfECh6MOy7mYwn7VZ3uzFJ0lHwDLWcEBZoJmFyJzm1i3ggdShUDJqdGhD2Wv2EyXi7Fe1AiHIgVWfy8fL5bpIqO5+2XdlM2zugVbvtPv2loqa99ZPypAMiioD83ESVIufRD/fv1Qi46IpEYM9GzXI0OOzdW31xYH6dgdDvIKZmQUpKCtG3Bm+cWkp46x+uB36G600Zjo"}
I'm sure I'll still get quite drunk at Edinburgh and stuffs though anyway.

I realise I've definitely said stuff that I'd much rather my parents not see than what's in there! It's a bit late to go back and encrypt them all now though, also I couldn't be bothered yo'.

Update on my life

Heyiiiz.

So I've finished college. I'm not looking forward to my exam results but sure whatever happens happens.

I was planning on having my blog app finished for this post but I'm still messing about with it (essentially done with what you guys can use) and I haven't written the blog-writer side for actually encrypting yet. I'll hopefully do that tomorrow.

I haven't gone out yet for finishing my exams. Nearly everybody else hasn't finished yet so there hasn't really been much point. Also it's mid-week so it's not nice for getting home from town. I'll be heading out Friday/Saturday at least, and probably some night next week before Edinburgh... I really hope we get good weather for Edinburgh, it'd be lovely to be able to sit on the grass in the sun like last time.

I added a nifty random post button thing on the right hand side of the page. I'm sure it won't get a lot of use, but I was trying to figure out how to make the app I'm writing go to a random post of mine, but I couldn't so I settled for a "widget" on this page instead..

Very different songs but I'm not really binging on anyone in particular at the moment.

Answering questions:


"Summer plans?" - No plans really after Edinburgh, I'll just see what happens. Go with the old flow.


"how important is money to you?" - I just want to be happy, I don't dream of being rich. I'm not so naive as to say that I don't care if I have no money though. You need money to survive and being poor is stressful. Money is a means to an end and nothing more; I don't want it for the sake of having it. I remember hearing about some study or something where they came to the conclusion that once you have enough money to get by, anything after that doesn't really affect your overall level of happiness; I believe that.




EDIT: Oh I forgot to say, the winner of the poll for cutest couple was "Lyncher and his hand". Congrats to Lynch and his hand, you've been together your whole life and you still can't get enough of your hand. The people think you're cutest.... Really says a lot about the people who read my blog doesn't it......

The last day of an era.

So today is the last day where I am really still a student. Tomorrow is my last exam and then I have no long term plans whatsoever. Tomorrows exam shouldn't be too bad but I should really do some study for it at some stage.

My exam on Saturday went kinda badly, but it could have been worse. I think I probably got over 40%. The worst exam I ever did I got 37% in. I'd say I confidently answered about the same amount of questions, but at least in this exam I was able to take a guess at most questions where I had no clue. I went to bed at 4ish the night before, and woke up at 8 to study. I thought I was fine all day, but my head just wasn't working. I hope I didn't make loads of stupid mistakes in the exam but given by my actions for the rest of the day, I probably wrote someone else's name on the front page. I got on a Malahide dart even though I had looked at the timetable a minute before. I went up to my cousins' house with Colm and Shane later. So it was the 3 of us and my 2 cousins Simon and Seamus. I told Seamus he was giving himself an extra chip in poker because I counted 36 chips already in the game so I thought there should be 6 each. Of course there was actually 35 chips and only 5 of us playing poker. And the one chip would make fuckall difference so I dunno why I even brought it up. There was more stupid mistakes I was making but I can't remember.
What I lacked in my mind though I made up for in beer pong. I was something else. We played 2 group rounds where the losing team had to do a shot, I was on the winning team both times. Then we did 1v1s with 1 glass each for shots, and I won 3 times. I took 2,3 and ~6 throws to win each time. It was ridiculous. Then we played the mushroom game and everybody kept picking me to drink in revenge for the beer pong so it nearly evened out.
We then got quite bikkied and played sarbc, I played really well in the first game, beating my cousin like 12-1 I think, then Colm beat him 12-0, then the drink caught up with me and I started being awful at it. I was actually on quite a bad buzz though at this stage. I was really paranoid and was feeling really weird. I was pretty convinced my cousin's thought that I was basically a remo, but then I kept being really surprised when they'd act drunk or say something about being drunk. I think it might have just been the fact that their mum was asleep in the room above us was making me see the situation differently. Either way I didn't love it and I had some very realistic and confusing dreams that night.
I dreamt that their mum came down and was freaking out because we hadn't left yet (we were meant to leave early), and that Shane had slept in and was late for work and I had to tell him he was late about 10 times to get him to get up. I also dreamt that I had just woken up in Edinburgh (since our class is going there after exams) and had been really out of it the night before, and people were telling me about things I had done and said, and I was just like, yeah that sounds exactly like me, fuck.

Needless to say I was relieved when I woke up.

So then yesterday I didn't do a tap of study since I was pretty hungover. I did however do a bit of coding for the encryption app for this blog I was talking about before. And a little bit more for the twitter one. The blog one is almost done. I'll stick up a first version pretty soon.

Hadn't listened to the latest Hilltop Hoods album at all, but they gave out a few free remixed tracks from their website the other day, one in particular was really cool which has gotten me back into them a bit.

Really like this one, it's a lot less shouty than their old stuff, which was kinda why I stopped listening to them so much.

Answering anon questions:

"Dinner tonight?" - Yeah sure thing


"what if instead of a missed opportunity it just wasn't meant to be?" - I dunno but it sure helps me sleep at night. (Very nice job copying my Myzone status whoever this was. It's from this. )


"what's your view on masturbation?" - There's about a hundred witty answers I could think of offhand to say to this... Here's a story instead. 
My cousin when he lived at home had 'Masturbation is sex with someone I really love' written on his wall. When I first saw it I was kinda young and thought it was just an older persons thing to have written up and did my best to ignore it. I never really thought about it again until I saw this question and I find it gas now to think he had that written on his wall. Jesus like, imagine the first time his mum saw that. I wonder what she said. I wonder if he wrote it up or one of his friends did and he just never washed it off. 
       Since it's a pretty out-there question I'll give it a proper answer too. I didn't really realise people had "views" on it. Basically everyone does it but presumably there are some exceptions, more often I'd imagine with girls. I haven't really talked about it too much with very many girls, but the gist I get seems to be that everyone I've talked to about it does it, but most of them know some other girls who say they don't. Maybe some girls get so much action that they never feel an urge to, but then those girls are sluts so they can't really look down on anybody for "flickin' the bean" or "playin' the one eyed japanese helicopter". I've never met a guy who says he never does it, but if I did it really wouldn't mean anything to me anyway. It's way more socially acceptable for guys to be really open about it though, probably because if girls were as bad as guys are then guys would be doing the monkey walk a whole lot more often (bah, I can't find that great clip from american dad I think it was...). I'd love to watch Superbad again actually. I feel really weird writing this since I don't know exactly who reads this, and even moreso because I know my sister reads it sometimes. Moo if you're reading this, that was all just a really sarcastic joke. Nobody does that because it's a sin and you'd go to hell. Also it's icky.


All this wank talk reminds me of this blog Saz linked to me before. It's so, so fucking disgusting nearly all the time: slutever.com. She has one or 2 funny bits in it but for the most part it's filthy and real gross, and she thinks she's real clever and individual (she's basically a hipster) but she's actually just a fickle dope. Just had a look at it again there; she is a freak of a human being....


Okay, study time unless I want exam time tomorrow to turn into sad time.

Poems from 14 year old James.

The Sadistic's Goodbye

I've been waiting for the day my life would end.

Waiting for the hour, that I would find it spent.

And you, you say you didn't know,

you say I didn't let it show.

But if you had looked closer, into my eyes,

you would see that I am concealed with lies

Yet from these eyes there are strong ties,

with a hear I could not start.

There's no passion in this heart,

and these eyes seek no prize.

So I implore why do you linger,

I do not want to ring your finger,

You must go with an eagle's haste,

and let me lay myself to waste.

I don't love you.

[Date given as "Sometime in the pasts future" - how annoyingly ambiguous of me]

A Lover's Devotion

My darling don't you know it,

And how I know it's true,

the night that I am crying,

I want to be with you

You'll guide me from a darkened corner

into a shadow's light.

It's little better here,

but at least I have no fear,

for it's in your stature's shade,

that I will find it bright.

You removed the demon from inside me,

Gave love to a hated heart,

And forever I want to be with you,

and have a brand new start.

Paranoid

I am in a barracks of heaven but I start to wonder,

start to think, of things of much worse taste,

Of the Demon or Angel outside my windows,

Just outside my view.

Is it an Angel there tempting my only view,

Trying to keep me safe,

In a saintly barracks of heaven, where I start to wonder,

start to think, of things of much worse taste.

Is it a thief deciding to or not, 

deprive me of my riches I had fought so hard to got,

As he is ever there outside my window,

Just outside my view.

Is it a Demon catching my lonesome eye,

Deciding if it is this night when I am due to die,

In a barracks of heaven, where I start to wonder,

start to think, of things of much worse taste.

It could be the mighty devil,

with his hands so full of my soul that I can't fight back,

as he is ever there outside my window,

Just outside my view.

And now where are you God

To whom that I had prayed? Are you too

In a barracks of heaven, wondering, thinking, 

of things of much worse taste, things outside your window, just outside your view.

So that was them..... They are pretty childish but for a kid who wasn't very creative I think I did alright with them. I didn't leave in the spelling mistakes :p. The second one was written as a response to the first one. 3rd is unrelated. I remember writing the 3rd one late one night when I was in the kitchen (last one up in the house) and couldn't see out the windows. We did Do Not Go Gently Into That Good Night in English at the time which I really liked so I wanted to try write a Villanelle. As you can see I failed, but I came sort of close for the small amount of effort I put into it.

Also, here's another phat beat. Got a fair bit of positive feedback on the last one which was literally a first.

Actually, a friend of a friend (who I've only met once) is in a song competition thing for some sweet gear apparently with coca cola. 

Here's his entry, I suggest you give it a listen because it's a pretty slick remix (I wouldn't link it unless it was since I don't actually know him very well).

Only takes a second to vote for him if you're feeling nice 

Night Night now. Don't forget to vote on the poll to the right, or ask me questions.

I'll answer the questions so far actually.

"Are you a frigid?!" - ye so whot iff im wiatin 4 d perfekt gurl. I wont mi first 2 b speciel.

"weirdest thing you ever ate?"- eh, the most mank thing I ever ate was a tofu dish from a chinese in kenya last summer. It honestly tasted like a bin smells. I also drank some of the water for washing colours from paintbrushes as a dare back in like 4th class. That was weird but not really eating anything.

"do you sleep with one eye open"- No

"IS SARAH AS COOL IN REAL LIFE AS YOU MAKE HER SEEM ON YO' BLOGGG?" -No

The Question Heir.

CHECK IT OUT -------------------------->

It's an ask an anonymous question box. So if there's anything you'd like for me to blog about, or any question at all that you want to ask me anonymously, you can use that gizmo. If it's a real good one I'll post the question and answer here. But probably I'll just post answers to questions here and you can go figure what the question would have been. Oh, if you want you can post something funny/embarassing that you did and I'll make a poll on the blog for who it was or something. I'll start it off with a fresh poll now. That would be fun.

Shane linked this song on his blog and it's frickin' awesome.

The video is cool too.

The other day moo and I were talking about just random crap instead of studying and we ended up talking about poems we wrote when we were younger which reminded me that I never posted those poems that I said I would ages ago. I'll do that later or tomorrow.

One more week and then exams are over basically. I have a real hard exam Wednesday, an easier one Friday, and then a really hard one on Saturday. I'm kinda fucked really. Yet I'm still in bed at 1.30pm so there ya go.... It'll be grand.
I have one last one then Tuesday week which should be pretty easy. It'll be nice to end on an easy one. I'm going to be a stressed bug for Wednesday-Saturday, so I probably won't blog. Or maybe I'll blog loads but hopefully not since I won't really have the time. Who really cares though.
My blog is boring these days, because I'm so boring these days. People (I hope it's not just me) become crazy self-centred around exam time. You just spend the whole time thinking about yourself because you kind of have to to get by. I think it just makes me boring to talk to without me really realising it at the time.

On another note I've been watching a fair bit of that 70s show again. It's so great, I've missed it dearly.

Right, better make a move to get out of bed and get me some brekkie.
Listen to that song. It's ace.

Modern Art

So I just read THIS
and it has become clear to me that modern art is purely for money laundering.
What better way for one drug baron to conveniently transfer millions of dollars to another in a different country without getting any notice?
All it takes is for each drug baron to get some coke-head in his country, say I'll give you lots more drugs if you literally take whatever the fuck you want, throw it on paper (or don't), make sure to insist on it being called art though, and then put together an exhibition and sell your piece of shit to my mate, drug baron eile.
Boom, millions transferred from England to Columbia, now let's send you your drugs son.

The governments know about it, but it's all part of the game man.
It's nothing new, Immortal Technique knows.

Also don't forget,
the world ends in December guys. Have a sweet last few months before the god Bolon Yokte' K'uh comes and fucks shit up.

I haven't actually been keeping count with these things, and I'm too lazy to google again, but is it just me or has there been an "End of the world" day basically every year for the last number of years?

Imagine if you died by some seemingly freak accident on one of those days, a heart-attack or something and you think you see someone else having one too or something, so then you're just chillin' in the afterlife. You'd be all like: "WOAH, it actually was the end of the world! I can't believe that, the whole world getting a heart-attack simultaneously! Hey, where is everybody else? They must be all about to come through.... Wait a minute.... BAH! FUCK!". Or at least I'd be all like that anyway.

I'm really just waffling instead of studying here aren't I.

Here's something to think about while you wait for my next blog post, lessons for life really.

A century of posts.

Song is fantastic, this is the chick from Morcheeba. She went solo for a good while, she's so awesome.

So the exam went okay yesterday, and I've definitely toned down my DrawSomething playing. It was getting out of hand (I do have 2 more that I'll throw down at the end).

The more I think about the exam the more I realise I answered things badly/wrong but I'm trying quite hard not to think about it. I took yesterday evening off study since I was so wrecked. I was feeling pretty shitty the night before and morning of the exam. You know when you feel like you're getting a fever and your bones are achy? It was sort of like that, but it passed and I'm fine. I don't think it was exam nerves. The feeling like I was going to puke in the morning could have been but I'll put down to getting up early. It's weird, but I get like "morning sickness" and I'm not even pregnant yet... I always feel like getting sick in the morning (especially if I eat) unless I take a huge-ass lie-in.
Actually, tongue's are fucking ridiculous things. My back left upper tooth is really sharp. I'm not sure if it's something to do with a filling back there, or if it was always sharp, but it's been grating off my tongue a bit which has gotten quite sore. Of course the natural thing for my tongue to do is SWELL UP. WHAT THE FUCK?? Where is the logic in that? Proof there is no God. Surely he'd never have made such a fundamental error. So since it became all swollen it kept rubbing off my teeth more and more and now it's quite sore to talk at times.

I don't think it's hit me how at a loose end I'm going to be after exams.
Mum goes the other day, "Only a few more weeks and then you're free for the summer!", to which I replied "Mum, I'll be free for the rest of my life.", which sounds like a good deal, but it's probably not. Without thinking about it, sure I'm going to have to find a job etc, but I can do it anytime and I can have a really sweet summer with nil worries or commitments already waiting up ahead, but in reality, it probably means the summer won't feel like a normal summer and I'll be worrying about getting a job.

Actually.
Fuck that.
This summer is going to be class. There's ALWAYS something that you can worry about in the back of your mind. Half the time it's shit you don't need to worry about at all. I'm not going to have any worries this summer. I actually do think I'm going to be real happy this summer. There's a good few people who aren't going away for the summer, and if I get a puppy I'll be inseparable from it and always have something to do. I really hope I don't bottle that plan. Mum does raise a good point that I'll probably be moving out in a couple of months though, but to be honest I don't think she'd mind having another dog around the house. Urghhh, is it a bit irresponsible of me to get one? Probably.
Is it a bad idea? I dunno.
I think having that responsibility in my life would probably be a really good thing though, a reason to live sorta jobbie, plus class dogs are class.

Growing up we've always had loads of pets in our house, we've had loads of budgies, when I was about 9 our 2 budgies had babies which were SO much fun to come down in the morning to see if they had hatched, we've had a guinea pig and loads of rabbits, 2 Irish Wolfhounds, an Irish Red Setter, and the pomeranian, we've had tortoises and newts and taken frog-spawn from the pond and watched them grow into little frogs before putting them outside, we've had fish of course, and we've had gerbils. We've also had some kittens for brief periods before finding them homes, and there used to always be a cat next door. But basically I've only ever had as MY pet a gerbil. One of the newts was "mine" in name, but it had nothing to do with me really other than I'd look at him occasionally and go, that one is mine and that one is Maura's. The gerbil (well I've had 2, I'll explain), was great. He was so tame it was crazy. Maura and I got one each from a petshop. He'd literally run up and down my arm and sit on my shoulder. He'd come to my hand when I put it down, and he'd sit still if I was moving.
Kinda like this:

Except mine was grey and smaller/younger than those lads.
But anyway, they must have been slightly sick when we got them or something, because they just randomly died after about a week and a half, both of them on the same day, and they were kept separately, a little suspicious now that I think about it. Then one of the teachers in school had some gerbils that her's had had, so we took 1 each again. Mum left Maura's one in the conservatory on a sunny day and he became toast. Mine was never so unlucky, but he was never tame. I did try, but maybe we got them too late, or maybe my heart just wasn't in it. I remember being bitten dozens of times by him before eventually deciding, stuff this and asking mum to find him a new home please. I think she gave him back to the teacher, can't really remember.
In short, gerbils are pretty class if you get a good one.

Better try do some study now I guess....