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Sunday, 3 April 2011

The League Of Very Mildly Superpowered Engineers. #1

Because blogging is more enjoyable than jython and token rings I'm going to try a new angle for some posts.

Episode 1 - Part-trick & the benefit of beans.

Hi, I'm Part-trick of The League Of Very Mildly Superpowered Engineers. I founded the league when I realised that there were other people like me out there..... Other people, who weren't just people... People who were also Superpeople!
I have many fantastic powers but the reason I'm special is I have a Superpower. I'm a Computer Engineering student but my real talent apart from missing lectures is my ability of Superhuman farts. They will quite literally blow you away. For maximum power I drop trow before doing them. This is also sanitary as the fecal particles do not get caught in your jeans, instead they get spread all over the room. The secret to my superpower is to eat many many lentils and beans. Also being born with a gift is helpful too.
My most super regular power is I am a master of impersonation. I can impersonate anybody and I myself cannot be impersonated. I also have an apt ear for music and I can groove like no other hip dude. Let me tell you a little story about how my powers and superpowers are a curse and a blessing.

I was in a nightclub having a dance. Everybody was looking at me dance so that they could learn how to jive like a boss. Anyways, some girl started coming onto me but I have a girlfriend so I didn't want this girl. I went into the bathroom and told my friend the bathroom attendant about my problem. He told me that deep down inside my heart I knew what I must do. He was right, there was only one option. So I left the bathroom and walked onto the dance floor. I saw the girl kissing some boy at the side of the stage, clearly this was her plan to make me drop my guard but I'm too clever for her. Using my huge brain I devised a plan to save the day. I went up and asked the guy what the hell he was doing with my girlfriend. He looked surprised and she started saying how I wasn't her boyfriend. I then said, "come on now cindy you know you are. This chump better leave quick smart lest he want to feel the pain of my hundred-dagger-punch" (This was a clever bluff as I do not have a move called the hundred-dagger-punch). The boy then left so I had disarmed her secret weapon and she knew I was winning. She started shouting at me in an attempt to make me think she had no ulterior motives but yet again my wit proved too quick for her. While she was shouting I dropped trow and blew the motherload at her. 
The bouncer's came over quite quickly after that to congratulate me on my victory and to escort me outside as my work here was done.

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