I really like the bit,
"I don't know what I am, but a part of that is knowin' what you ain't "
It's very true. I really hope I grow up to be a parent who can tell their kids gems like that. Just profound stuff that grounds you. Gives you a better clue as to what's going on you know?
So the house hunting is going slow. I had this idea in my head there'd be tonnes of deadly gaffs just waiting to be let out, but it's not the case. It's crazy competitive to get a good house it seems. The good ones are gone the evening they're put up. We applied for one today, I emailed about 15 minutes after it went up, and Donal rang about half an hour after that, yet we still haven't heard from them. It was a pretty slick house, had a piano and all. Funny though, one bedroom was sooo nice, huge, and then one was really quite small. Would be interesting to see who would get lumped with what if we get it! It had a piano too which is pretty fucking cool, although it looked ancient from the pics.
Finally got a visa debit card, wayooo, applied for a credit card but they were all like noway son you can't do that shit online cos you only been workin' lyk a month, but they nicely and unexpectedly sent me out the debit card. So this means that I finally got around to buying a google dev account.
There's seriously no excuse not for downloading the new version of the app now, you literally click the link on the right there, click add to chrome, click Add (it doesn't actually monitor your browsing activity, that's just so it can tell when you're on my webpage I think), and then you have the app installed. Next step is go to settings, take that UserID and ask me for a password for that userID and you're done. It'll automatically update in future and will automatically decrypt any interesting stuff I write in the secret bits ;).
Peeeeeeeace out kids <4 (it's like love plus 1, ya geddit? zomg so cute :p:p:p (I'm getting weird I think....));
Oh actually, as an afterthought I'll finally write down this start of a rap I made up the other day.
Thought ( /sorta stole the start) of it while I was listening to this.
I just sorta made it cuter.
It's now no longer about a dysfunctional relationship.
It's about a guy chatting up a girl he just met.
I swear I didn't say this to someone.
Could you like me?
Cos I like you,
You're so damn beautiful that I have to.
And would it help if I could make you laugh too?
Or if I said that there's nothing that I wouldn't do, or say
if it might brighten up your day,
like hey, gimme your hand, for just a little minute
and I'll put my heart in it
and if you don't want it you might as well bin it
cos if you don't want it, well then I don't want it neither.
and if I'm making you feel awkward just say and I can leave here,
cos I don't wanna be near you if that'd make you unhappy,
but if you want me to stay just look at me,
and maybe give me a smile, make my heart stop for a while.
This whole 2012 buzz. World ending etc.
Is it just me or has everybody been really quiet about it lately? All these muzzie nations getting real pissed off at other countries because of what one guy in them said is nuts. Some of these places have nukes and the likes. Shit could pop off so easy and when it does, we're basically all fucked. I'm not really bothered to worry about it though. I'm not worried at all. That'd be a waste of time.
Went cliff jumping with Ryan, his kiwi mate, and Ryan's brother and sister the other weekend. It was actually really, really good fun. I hadn't really seen Ryan's siblings for a while, they've really grown up. His brother is a full on adult now, and his sister is no longer a little kid. How weird is it when you hear someone who you think of as a child saying things about being out in town. It's nuts. Really makes you realise how you're no longer a kid yourself, and also in a way notice how young you were when you used to talk like that.
Anyway, check me out.
I'm gonna be moving out sometime pretty soon with 2 of the lads from college. Actually can't wait. It's going to be so much fun. We're still househunting at the moment, but we reckon somewhere around Rathmines would be ideal. Really looking forward to having a housewarming party, I hope we get a good place for parties, as in a deece amount of space. It'd be handy to have somewhere like that to have parties to keep in touch with the class etc. I'm gonna miss having the piano there, even though I don't play it all that much.
Gonna get a google dev account soon and then you can all (all 3 or something of you) bask in the awesomeness of my app. Going to stick up the encryption side too and maybe charge for it. It'd be cool if even one person bought it I reckon.
Gonna migrate to blogging on my own website one I'm bothered. Don't worry, I'll give you plenty of notice.
Hopefully not too long away......... :P
Anyway, figured I'd just pop in and say hello.
Goodbye.
Has anyone noticed that my blog takes ages to load now?
For some reason blogspot is getting really shit...
Going to have to migrate this yoke to my website when I'm bothered..
Just lashing this up for the following reason.
I finally got around to making my blog-app auto update and did various little bug fixes with it.
You can download it by clicking on the nifty "locked-freedom" picture on the right.
To be honest, if you download this you'll need to download it again in a little while (as soon as my credit card arrives) when I put it on the chrome web-store as opposed to my server that it's on now since I'll stop updating the one I'm hosting... (If that doesn't make sense to you, don't worry about it and don't bother downloading it).
The reason I'm posting this is because I need 1 or 2 testers for this version. By testers I just mean download it, get a password and tell me if it breaks.
Anyway, one trick to downloading it.
Click the button, it'll download.
Then it'll say it's not coming from the Google Chrome webstore so you can't install it. That's a lie. Google is lying to you.
So, type chrome://extensions in the url bar. Drag the downloaded file into this page and it'll install.
Badabing, Badaboom.
Hadn't played squash in 2 weeks. Doesn't sound like a long time but I'm so wrecked after that training just there I don't think I'd be even able to sleep. -What?
I get so square eyed these days.
Reading stuff on screens all day in work just fucks with my eyes, and then if I have nothing to do when I get home I just watch tv / dick about on the computer, so it just makes it even worse. Right now my eyes are so fucked I can barely see. Thank god for sleep eh?
And thanks to Shane for linking this pretty slick band to me.
My cousin's wedding was last weekend. It was amazing fun. It's great seeing your relatives, you forget how nice they are to you. Full of compliments so they are that lot.
It was a weird wedding because none of the cousins were invited apart from us since we're very close to the bride as we live near them. My aunts and uncles though are great fun altogether. The dancing was gas craic.
I was giving it socks.
Went to Electric Picnic the next day. Caught up with Shane in Athy and we popped over. It was good fun, especially getting loadsa free booze from Colm. First place we looked for him and there he was behind the counter. That's the thing about those things actually. It's fucking impossible to find anyone. Especially with smartphones. Signals better these days, but battery life is shite. I charged my phone that morning and it still died after about an hour after getting there.
Ended up getting not quite drunk enough and then a bit too bikkied a bit too early and just basically sat down by a fire and wanted to go to sleep. It was good fun all the same though, but so much for planning on pulling a britch or 2 that weekend.
My little sister is finally back from Canada for the summer, and we watched the movie Death Proof the other night. I thought it was really good anyway. Also, The Runway is another one we watched and that's pretty slick too. Totally different, very Irish.
When I was little I used to feel unsure of things; underconfident and insecure.
I thought adults had it all figured out.
I thought adults knew what they wanted in life.
I thought they were all sure of themselves.
Most importantly, I thought they were all wise.
I know better now.
I'm not sure of what I want from life, and I guess I am an adult now, but I look around me and see nobody else knows either.
Nobody is as confident as I had thought.
Nobody is that clued in tranquil person I used to think existed.
I don't know anybody who is wise when it comes to human nature.
I think perhaps growing up is simply realising this.
It's realising the world isn't what you thought.
It's not this place where everybody is mentally secure.
Old people are insecure too.
Old people revisit regrets from time to time.
Nobody can know for sure why people act the way they do. Nobody always knows for sure what the right thing to do is.
Nobody is that wise old granny in that film you saw.
I like to think Skye Edwards, (the chick from morcheeba) has it figured out, because that's the way her music makes her appear. And although I'd probably like to meet her most out of everybody in the world, I'd hate to meet her to find out she's the same as me. The same as you. The same as everybody.
I suppose there's comfort in knowing we're all in it together.
We all flicker together in this world, wildly and aimlessly together, and in a few moments we rejoin the dirt.
Life comes and life goes, on and on again.
There's some amount of beauty in it.
There's sadness too, but it's not real sadness.
If our time wasn't limited would we value life so much?
If we could truly grasp it's limit would we value our time more, or would we simply panic?
These guys are a big faggoty but it's relevant to what I'm saying here.
One lyric from The Herd that I really really like is:
But yet the most important thing that's ever happened to me,
And that will set you free"
The whole song has amazing lyrics actually. It's worth a read and a ponder, even if you don't want to listen to the song.
They make better points than I ever could. Ray of Sun Lyrics
It's funny actually. People always ask the big question.
What do you think happens when you die?
Does it not only make sense that after death is the same as before life?
How can people expect that you still live on after death, unless they believe that you existed before birth?
Re-incarnation is the only belief I could possibly buy into. How can people be so hopeful as to expect that souls can be created but not destroyed?
This is going to make me sound like a weirdo I'm sure, but I've had a number of dreams that have stuck with me. I remember having these dreams when I was very little. Well obviously I don't actually remember. But I assume I had these dreams when I was very young and it's so long ago now I can't really remember when exactly, they've just sort of always been with me.
In one I was an old adult, lying on my deathbed in some place. I had family or friends around me and then I died. I rose out of my body and they cried I think. They were sad but I wasn't. That was it.
In another one I was in a big huge circular open room in the clouds. It was some sort of ball or party or something, I'm not quite sure. There were lots of us, and we were afraid. We were waiting to be born but I didn't want to go. Going meant that I would have to say goodbye forever to my loved ones. I had no choice though. I had to go. So I did.
Nobody knows what is on either side of life.
We just have to enjoy the ride.
I told myself a short while ago that I should smile at randomers more. I don't smile enough. If I make eye contact with a girl I very rarely smile unless I'm on a night out. I should smile but I'm always paranoid that I'll be like that guy who waves back at someone who isn't waving at them. Also, maybe I don't have a nice smile. When I'm drunk I might think I look like this:
Or even this:
but what if I actually come across more like this.
This song's pretty copasetic.
I was also thinking of winking at girls sometimes. Winks are so cheeky. Yeah I think I just need to not worry and smile at people more anyways. This kinda ties in with something I had been meaning to talk about actually.
Hot girls on the dart.
They're rare, but when they happen, I always kinda hope they don't sit next to me. That's really just not natural is it? You know you're in for an awkward dart trip home when there's some sweet sitting opposite you. You want to look at them, but then you don't want to be obviously looking at them. And if you do make eye contact the chances are you both have earphones in so you can't say anything even if you had the balls to, and you can't smile in case they think you're a freak and want to change seats. That'd be the worst, if you're that guy who makes them feel so uncomfortable that they want to change seats but train etiquette dictates they're not allowed unless a fully empty set of seats opens up. You also want to talk to them, but that's really just way out of train etiquette. If everybody could talk to anybody they like on the DART it'd just be such a pain in the ass getting it everyday.
I'd never choose to sit down next to a hot girl on the dart, I'd always choose some middle aged man ahead of them. But then ironically I do get slightly offended when there's not many empty seats but people still don't sit next to me even though it's the obvious choice.
Do I look dirty? Do I smell? Do I look like high or drunk? Or someone who's likely to get sick on them?
Or wet myself? Did I wet myself? No, I definitely didn't wet myself. Not yet.
So why don't you sit next to me??
Eh?
Do I make hot girls feel like that when I choose to sit next to some 90 year old incontinent woman?
I doubt it. I'd say they know exactly what's going on. I don't want to come across as a freak, and we're both better off for it.
I'm not trying to say I'm the equivalent of a hot girl in case anybody gets that notion. My point is I'm a very regular looking guy. If somebody said I need a typical male, I think I could probably do that job. I should be easy to sit next to.
[edit: I just realised that I probably only think I'm typical looking because I'm the guy that I've seen the most in the world. Most people probably think they're typical looking? Although, I'm average height, average build, most common hair colour, common skin colour... I am pretty typical :p]
Actually watch this video. It's so gooood.
This isn't the actual music for it but it's nicer music than the original I reckon.
Pro Squash player:
I've always had this thought in my head that I probably could have succeeded at anything I wanted. I think most people nowadays feel that way. I'm not going to lie, I'm actually quite good at any sport I try. I don't think I've ever had a sport where I just suck ass at it. Unless skateboarding counts. I sucked hard at that when I tried it as a kid.
I never actually started getting properly good at any sports until I was about 16. I started playing a lot of squash then and it just improved my balance, coordination and strength for pretty much everything. I still never over-achieved at squash though. I played for the province but never made the Irish team. I never really tried to though either. I had it in my head that other people were better than me even when they weren't. I never had the drive for it. Same problem with sailing.. Sorta. I always had a sucky ass boat with old ass sails. But even if I was doing okay in races I'd do worse than I should because I'd get out of peoples way just because they'd say so, even if I had right of way. And I'd give them room around marks even if I had no reason to let them in.
I guess what I'm trying to say is I, of all people, wasn't competitive enough in competitions. I was definitely competitive around my friends, but mentally I never cared enough to be a competitive dick to people I didn't know.
I always get told I have a lovely style of play for squash. A natural or whatever. I kinda always just thought people said that to every young player, but since I still get told it sometimes I guess it must be true. A guy at training the other night told me pretty adamantly that he thinks I could have gone pro if I had really tried. (There's no money professional squash really so I was never going to.) He also told me to get angry on court and not be so pleasant, because it's hard to win if you're not really engaged in the match. That is definitely true. If I'm having a laugh and really enjoying the match I always play way worse.
I was also told I'm hitting the ball better now that I ever have before which is weird since I haven't been playing too much.
In conclusion, I've definitely underachieved at sports because I've not had the drive to win, but I've enjoyed them so fuck it. I think working actually does give me an extra drive to try in squash somehow. I find I work a bit harder in training now.
Sarah said I never mention people in my blog posts when we had our super sexy lunch date today. Thanks Sarah for meeting me for lunch, you da best. Work was SO boring today and will be for the next 2 days. The guy training me is away and I've been left with not a lot to do and I'm not 100% on what exactly I have to do of the little bit I have. It's frightful boring. If anybody wants to meet me for lunch around baggot st area around 1pm please do so I can justify taking my whole hour of a lunch break.
Peace out.
Stay classy guys.
I love you. Quick question.
Please answer it in the anonymous ("Ask me anything") box on the top right!
I noticed I still got a few blog hits since my last post which is weird. I used to get none when I'd stop blogging for a few days.
Do you check my blog regularly, do you know my in person?
And what do you like (or dislike if you wanna be a dick) about my blog?
